The Trickiest Part of Parenting my 3 Year Old

All of the sudden, the kid is on to me when I try to throw his stuff away.  You know, important stuff, like his coloring pages, broken toys, half eaten apples...Stuff like that.   He seems to have a sixth sense about when one of these "treasures" has made it into the trash and gives me the third degree about why I could have possibly thought it was a good idea to throw away what was apparently his most prized possession.  It's like the garbage police live here. 

Sorry kid, our house is on the market.  Only the necessities make it out alive.  If I can live without a microwave, you can live without the hair covered gooey hand you got out of the quarter machine at the grocery store.  

He's cute though, right?

Being Secure in Your Manhood is....

Not being afraid to always need to have your tea set close by.

Even when you are playing video games.

In case you were wondering--
Yes, my son's current favorite toy is a tea set.  Judge if you feel the need, but as long as it continues to buy me a solid 45 minutes of play every day the tea set is a friend of mine.
Yes, he is playing some sort of Nintendo gaming system circa 2005.  I found it in a drawer, and again, friend of mine.
Yes, Holden is having a particularly heinous hair day.  That one is my fault.  His baby chick texture hair continues to best me day after day.

Indoorsy

Springtime weather is very hit or miss.  Mostly miss, if you ask me.  Although on nice days we have been spending major time soaking up the sun, most of our time is still spent indoors.  Here's a little bit of what we've been up to during the not so pleasant days.

Sharing our playdoh.

Practicing the air drums.

Stacking up our books before reading them--and getting all OCD when they don't stack the way we want them to.

Trying out our new "grill"--unfortunately I did not get a close up of the dollar signs on the teeth.

More makeshift drumming while in desperate need of a haircut.

And most recently, when we woke up to snow this morning, making these yummy muffins

and practicing our model poses while watching general conference on our temporary floor bed after a certain 2 year old announced--"sorry for peeing on the couch!"  (Trust me, you don't want to know more.)

Okay, so really this post was mostly to do something with all the random pictures that have accumulated on my camera over the last little while, but lucky for you, my kid is cute so all the pictures are not at all excessive, right?...Right??

What I Like About Two

Holden has been two for a month now. Although I definitely can see why these are called the Terrible Twos, for the most part I am really enjoying my kid these days. Here's why:

The giantness of his babyhood has balanced out. As of now he is 34.5 inches (60th percentile) and 30 lbs (75th percentile). Still not a shrimp by any means, but my arms are thankful he is no longer a 99th percentile kind of kid. Especially because he has realized that walking is the pits and has reverted to wanting to be carried everywhere.

Seeing Holden learn new things is remarkable. Seeing him learn new things incorrectly is just funny. For instance, this is how he counts. 1-10, 11, 12, 13, 16, 17, 19, 17 and then 19 and 17 repeat themselves until you tell him he can stop counting.

He talks. A lot. And he and I have some pretty interesting conversations.
Example-
Holden: I play in cupboards?
Me: No, we aren't playing in cupboards right now.
Holden: I'm so excigeg to play in cupboards. Good choice!

Other favorites: "How's your day, mama?" and "It's okay to poop."

He does not understand the concept of playing independently. Sometimes I don't find this so endearing, particularly when I want to drink a Diet Coke or go to the bathroom, but him forcing me to play with him at all times forces me to stop and enjoy him while he still wants me around.

And now for what I DON'T like about two. I searched through every single picture I have taken of Holden since his birthday and I found these three that were acceptable. And by acceptable I mean he was A) looking at the camera, and B) not crying. My standards are not high. You may or may not be getting Christmas cards this year if this keeps up. Or maybe you'll get one with a photo of just me and Reo on it.

Photography Fail

Today was a nice day.

I decided to take Holden out and try to take some Fall pictures in his super cute (in real life...I promise) hat.

Instead, I got some pictures of Holden in what appears to be a really bad mullet wig.

Advice to self: Leave everything to the professionals...Always...

This Face

Just so we're clear. This face

makes that other face I was complaining about

SO worth it.

Holden's Life Just Got a Little Better

He's discovered the joys of a bubble bath.

Life is good.

My Thoughts On Our "Campout"

I feel as though "campout", similarly to "scrapbooking" and "gardening" needs to have quotes around it lest people get the wrong idea about my skills. Those of you who are die hard campers would laugh at my less than 24 hour overnight jaunt that I consider to be my summer camping trip. I slept in a tent and I ate s'mores. It doesn't get more camping than that, right?

Holden decided to start the trip off right by getting completely filthy before we even stepped foot onto the campsite. If a little bit of licorice face keeps him from having a total meltdown during the car ride, so be it. Yes, you heard me, again with the licorice. Don't judge.
Side note: Turns out Reo about has a panic attack seeing our child get dirty. Good thing Holden and I clean up the shananigans that take place while Reo's at work, or he might have child protective services after me.

We brought along the men folk in the form of Reo and my brother in law Dan to do the hard labor, like putting up the tent.

Thanks to their skills we got down to business lounging around inside the tent in no time.

Holden discovered that throwing rocks around the campsite is the funnest thing ever. Except maybe throwing rocks at people's heads. Time-out is hard to enforce in the great outdoors, but after getting clocked with a couple of boulders, you figure out a way.

I discovered that Holden has no fear of water, not even sicko, murky water. A nice morning stroll around the reservoir turned into a fully clothed me chasing a fully clothed Holden into a freezing cold body of water before he could finish diving in headfirst.

One of the best parts of camping is catching up on my trashy magazines. Shocker alert: Jake and Vienna didn't make it? If those two kids can't work it out, my marriage doesn't stand a chance.

Reading all those trashy magazines has helped me realize my true potential. I should definitely be moonlighting as a papparazzo. If Reo were famous you would totally be seeing this picture in the next issue of Us Weekly, don't you think?

Due to Reo having that previously discussed problem with Holden getting dirty, he was only allowed the (untoasted) marshmallow part of a S'more. Holden didn't seem to mind.

Overall, a good time was had by all. "Camping" may be something we attempt again.

Say No To This Kid...I Dare You

Who wants to be the disciplinarian for my child? Anyone? Because I'll be honest, between the super cute pouting and the cheeseballing, I just don't have the heart. I left the mini tantrum that followed out of the video, because some of you don't have kids yet, and I'd like you to. But even that was kind of adorable, in it's own way.

P.S. Once again, sorry about the bad quality. Steven Spielberg I am not.

P.P.S. Don't be alarmed that Holden looks like he is scratching 10,000 bug bites. That is his attempt at the sign language word for please.

Lucky Number Seven

Seven years ago today Reo and I got married. We took a (rare) picture together to celebrate. You can tell it is rare because I haven't mastered the skill of self portrait taking. What do you think? A little different from ourselves 7 years ago?

And just to add to the "awwwwwwwwww, how cute" factor, here is us about 10 years ago.

P.S. Please pardon the very poor picture quality. I was much too lazy to scan old photos, so I took a picture of a picture. I know, right? If technology was dead (were dead?) it would roll over in its grave because of me.

P.P.S. I was feeling pretty vain due to all the pictures of me in this post, so check out this awesome kid. How jealous are you of his eyelashes? Seriously, I want to rip them off of his face and attach them to mine. In the least violent way possible, of course.

P.P.P.S. At what point do I start getting judged when I post pictures of my kid with a pacifier in his mouth?

Holden's Thoughts On Winter

Not a huge fan... To relive my thoughts on winter, see here.

Baby Proofing Fail

Umm, Mom?
These little pronged things that you stuck in all the outlets are for pulling out of the wall, putting in my mouth, and then putting back into the wall, right?
Just checking!

Because A Boy Needs Options...

A Shoe Story

Amount of time spent (by Holden) pulling 20 some odd pairs of shoes from their homes: 45 seconds

Amount of time spent (by me) returning 20 some odd pairs of shoes to their homes: 5 minutes

Uninterrupted time to put my makeup on and (sometimes) blow dry my hair: PRICELESS!

Bad Hair Day

I'd like to preempt this post by saying that I am really glad that Holden is getting some hair. Really, really glad. I am just not so sure what to do with hair that appears to be growing straight up. Alternate View

Why I'm Glad I'm Not a Professional Photographer

Holden and Jack are friends. You would not know they were friends based on this photo shoot. Before getting "the perfect shot" we had...
1 baby try to push the other off of the couch (P.S., Holden is very sorry for that, Jack)
2 babies try to crawl away
2 babies crying like we were trying to make them sit on nails together
1 baby give up and play dead
1 baby with a disproportionate amount of hair to the other baby (how do you think it would look if I just cut off some of Jack's hair and taped it to Holden's head?)
4 parents laughing hysterically at their children's woes

Free Shipping

If any of you out of towners want Holden to come visit, we found the perfect size box to ship him in.

But you can't keep him too long....I'm kind of getting attached to him.

Paparazzi

I am getting the feeling that Holden thinks I take too many pictures of him. What do you think?

Eat Your Veggies

Holden has become a connoisseur of baby food this last month or so. He has tried many different varieties, with much success.

Holden is particularly fond of:
Sweet Potatoes
Green Beans
Peaches

Holden is NOT particularly fond of:
Umm....There is nothing he is not particularly fond of. Have you seen this kid? He is not one to be picky!

Pick Your Battles

Sunday morning at the Manning household. Reo and Holden go into Holden's room to change him out of his pajamas (which he has spit up on). They emerge a few minutes later. Holden is wearing this delightful ensemble.

Please notice the lovely choice of an ill fitting onesie and coordinating stretchy pants. Does this outfit scream "daddy dressed me" or what?

For sake of comparison, here is an example of what Holden looks like when I dress him.

**Editor's Note: Reo would like to interject that it WAS Sunday morning, and he knew we weren't taking Holden out in public before changing him into his church clothes. True as that may be, Holden does have about 40,000 outfits in his closet that both fit and match, yet those were overlooked.